10 things I’ve learned over 25 years at work
After a quarter of a century with my nose to the grindstone, here are some life lessons I’ve picked up along the way
I recently realised I’ll have been working for 25 years this summer, which caused me to reflect.
What have I actually learned in that time? Have I just been going through the motions? Have I learned anything from which others might benefit?
I went over some particular situations where things haven’t gone quite as anticipated during my career, and from those, I’ve come up with the following list.
1) Ask for help
If I’m being honest, I still haven’t completely nailed this one.
Back in 2008, my dad was in the final few months of his life — but I hadn’t told anyone in the office about it.
My work started suffering and it was only when things got so bad that I broke down in front of my boss.
Now I reflect, it was stupid of me not to say something earlier, but I thought I could cope on my own. Newsflash! I couldn’t.
The moral: If something outside work is causing your problems, tell someone. It’s a hard-hearted person that won’t cut you some slack — and if they don’t, then it’s not the job for you anyway!
2) Your health is more important than anything
There have been a few times in my career when I’ve worked silly hours — but that’s usually for just one project.
There has been at least once where I’ve worked over and above for a longer period of time and it ended badly. I experienced what — in modern parlance — can only be called ‘burnout’.
I made a mistake (not life and death, but not good for the company concerned) and caused myself and my boss problems.
She practically ordered me to take some time off — which I did — and I came back wiser (to some extent), but it was too late for that job.
Moral: You might think you owe your job and company something, but nothing is more important than your own health and personal wellbeing. I repeat my earlier point — if your employer doesn’t care about you, then maybe they’re not the right place to be working.
3) Give yourself a reason for working
Dan Pink cites three key themes around motivation in his excellent book Drive. They are
- Mastery
- Autonomy
- Purpose
Back in 2009 after my Dad had died, mastery and autonomy weren’t an issue. I was at a stage in my career, where I had those. I struggled with the latter, though.
I was working for a company that — ostensibly — was making money for its faceless shareholders and little else. And I was chasing page views on a daily basis, in order to help ad revenue, to make money for those shareholders.
Not exactly stoking the fires of meaning, eh?
My Dad’s death made me re-think my priorities big-time. So much so, I left the shareholder-led company and have been in the charity sector ever since.
Moral: Find a job you believe in and pursue it relentlessly. If it gives you purpose, then you’ve found something good.
4) It’s not just about ‘the work’
It’s become one of the modern employment buzzwords — culture. But don’t dismiss it out of hand. The other elements of your everyday job are equally as important as the actual work itself.
- Are the people friendly — do you have (a) work best friend/s?
- Do people get together and do other things: lunchtime ‘clubs’, after-work sports teams, staff wellbeing group?
- Are there places for people to share ideas?
- Does the senior leadership team listen to staff and interact with them?
- Is there a general buzz about the place?
Moral: although quite indefinable, a work culture can be one of the main reasons why you choose to stay at or leave a job.
5) If a job’s not right, get out
Not every position and every conpany is as it seems from the job description.
Occasionally you get an inkling at interview stage, but sometimes you only realise a job isn’t right after you’ve started.
Moral: Get out as soon as you can. Financially you may need to find another job first, but move quickly. This sounds harsh, but it’ll affect your health, your confidence and your weekdays won’t be pretty.
6) Work is tough
Let’s not gild the lily here — a lot of the time, your job will be gut-wrenchingly difficult.
And that’s ok. It’s why you have to take into account nos 3, 4 & 5 when it gets like that — to give a sense check and make sure you’re in the right tough job.
This ‘pearl’ of wisdom also has to be counterbalanced by no.10.
Moral: it’s not just work that’s tough. Life is a lot of the time. It’s the grit in the oyster that makes you come back for more.
7) Don’t date at work
I’ve seen it countless times and it practically never ends well.
There’s the initial fun bit, but that quickly turns into secrecy, as you try to keep it quiet — which is impossible. Everyone else always guesses before you tell them.
If you’re lucky you won’t actually work in the same team or on the same floor, but you’ll still do everything you can to ‘accidentally' bump into your new squeeze — which is actually embarrassing for all your co-workers.
Finally, when it all goes wrong (which it does a lot of the time), you’ll be good for nothing and often feel the need to leave.
That’s all assuming you don’t work anywhere that bans co-workers from getting together in the first place.
Moral: there’s a modern-day metaphor that involves loos and doorsteps. Nuff said.
8) Keep enough of your private life private
I’m a fairly private person, but I doubt my co-workers would think that.
I’m happy to talk about what we did at the weekend, watched on TV, had for dinner last night.
The little things. The stuff that’s trivial.
What I don’t do is have loud shouting matches with my other half on the phone, nor discuss my personal problems at work (which I’ve seen and heard numerous times in 25 years).
Moral: It’s fine to have friends to confide in at work. Tell your boss, too, if things are likely to cause you an issue (see No.1), but I genuinely believe that you need to have some sort of separation: church & state = worklife & homelife.
9) Keep learning at all costs
In case you hadn’t noticed, the technological revolution has upended the world of work.
When I started, my office still had a telex, almost no-one had personal email addresses, and full text web engines had only just been invented. Within a week, I became the office photocopier expert.
Over the years, I’ve had to acquire so much new stuff and know there’s still iso much to come.
I can’t tell you which direction to go, but I can suggest you take in as much as you can, from as many different sources. David Epstein in the brilliant book Range hits this on the head:
“Our greatest strength is the exact opposite of narrow specialization. It is the ability to integrate broadly.”
Moral: Never think you’re done. Period.
10) Have fun
There’s a reason why undertakers and mortuary workers are renowned for having a dark sense of humour. It’s because it makes the job better and — oddly — fun.
Enjoying yourself at work is not something to be scared of. It’s 1/3 of your life, so don’t be one of those people who thinks everything has to be serious all the time.
I mean, sure, every job has its tough, earnest moments, but that doesn’t have to be the norm.
What’s more, happier colleagues will perform better, so it’s practically a motivational tool.
Moral: Find ways to lighten the mood on a daily basis— just don’t think that has to be a comedy tie or Mickey Mouse braces. They are NEVER fun!
Any others? I know I’ll have missed some obvious things, so feel free to chip in below.
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